FORGIVENESS

According to a 2001 study at the Michigan Institute for Social Research women are more forgiving than men. I wonder if this study included fathers forgiving their children. As mothers we tend to coddle our children a little more than fathers do. When our children do not act or behave in the manner in which we expect them to we still love them. We don’t stop loving them because they act like children. Some grow-up/mature faster than others do so it takes longer for them to actually get their life together.

Slow maturity makes life difficult on us as parents because we want to protect them from bad choices and harsh consequences. We want our children to have a good life but we cannot live their life for them or make their choices for them. They have to make their own mistakes and mature at the rate at which they mature.

This makes forgiveness a necessary part of the parent/child relationship. They have to know that no matter what we love them. We may not approve or agree with their behavior but we still love them. Withholding love because we don’t approve of someone’s behavior is not biblical. Jesus said to forgive someone 77 times.

We must love AND forgive our children just as Christ loves and forgives us. We must continue to guide them and ALWAYS pray for them by name. God has a plan for them just as He has plans for us. We should not impose our will on God’s will for their lives. We don’t know what they need to experience in order to develop into who they will be or what they will accomplish in their life time. So we must trust that God knows and our children are a part of a larger plan – God’s plan.

SCRIPTURES

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. Matthew 18:21-22

Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged. Colossians 3:21

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Ephesians 4:29-32